Foxes and FOs

I don’t know what it is lately, but I have had some SERIOUS knitting mojo lately…..I’m like a sticks-and-strings-superhero.  Maybe it’s because I’m not miserable and depressed anymore….maybe it’s because I only have SEVEN WEEKS LEFT before this baby is born….maybe its has to do with the fact that it’s finally autumn. I can’t quite put my finger on it. But I do know, I’m blowing through stitches like a tornado in a trailer park.

First up is my Flutterby Mitts.

catching butterflies

The pattern is Catching Butterflies by the utterly fabulous Tiny Owl Knits. They’re made out of Lorna’s Lace Shepherd Sock in the colorway “Monkeyshines”. This particular skein has been sitting in my stash for THREE YEARS.  I actually almost got rid of it, because it was starting to remind me of the color of a half-burned piece of toast. I am obviously very happy that I didn’t, though. They were a quick knit and they turned out beautiful. The butterflies are a little wonky (I am hopeless at embroidering) but overall, I’m super happy with them.

Next up, is my new favoritest thing that has ever come off of my needles.

fantasticmrfoxinstagrammr.foxstolemyheart

HOLYCRAPSOMUCHCUTENESSICANTTAKEIT.  I like, want to snuggle with him when I’m going to bed at night. Once again, pattern is courtesy of the amazing Tiny Owl Knits, called Mr. Fox Stole My Heart. And stole my heart, he did. The yarn is Knit Pick Wool of the Andes Bulky in Hazelnut, and Wool of the Andes DK in Charcoal and Cloud. I’m planning on making a Mini-Mr. Fox for D as soon as I get a few more things in my Ravelry queue churned out.

Seriously guys, if you like whimsical, woodsy patterns, check out Stephanie Dosen’s book of TOK patterns, Woodland Knits. Its one of my favorite knitting books. Even if the patterns aren’t your thing, the book itself is beautiful. The styling and the locations are both gorgeous.

In family news, Stink has transferred into a “big girl bed”. The decision to put her crib away came shortly after she dove headfirst over the railing onto the tile floor of doom. (Our entire house is tiled.) One look at this….

charlieblackeye

and I couldn’t get rid of her crib fast enough. It was bittersweet in a way….her first black eye.

 

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Through the fire

I see that the last time I blogged was in May. ::yikes:: So much has happened, in the way of ginormous life decisions.

First things first: I decided, shortly after my ex left, to put this baby up for adoption. Now, I could go through a big, long, tragic story and hash out every single detail of this decision, but I’m not going to make whoever reads this suffer through all that. In a nutshell, I realized that I can’t provide the type of emotional and financial support that a newborn needs. To do so, and to fail at it, would just be punishing him (yes, he’s a boy), and he doesn’t deserve that. My stepdad has helped me find a wonderful couple who have been trying to adopt for the past seven years, and I’m completely confident that Baby Banana (D’s nickname for him) is going to have a beautiful life with them. And, since the moment I decided to do this, I have not felt one shred of regret. I know that I’m doing the best possible thing that I could ever do for him, and I feel pretty damn good about that.

To add fuel to the fire, my ex has completely vanished. After a few months of wrangling with him not paying his half of the bills and the rent like he had promised to, and just generally being a completely worthless, irresponsible, selfish loser (surprise surprise) I decided to completely cut him off. I turned off his phone that was in MY name, let all of the bills that were in his name go to collections, and I changed my phone number. I haven’t spoken to him in three months, and I gotta tell ya, things couldn’t be more peaceful. All he gave me was excuses, sob stories, and stress, and I got sick of it. I absolutely refuse to pander to a 30 year-old manchild.

At this point, I’m trying to move towards forgiving him, but I haven’t quite gotten there yet. I’ve been praying about it, but I know that I have to be willing to open my heart for God to be able to help me, and I just can’t right now. I’m going to keep working on it, though. That’s all I can do.

 

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